The ‘So what?’ box

Whenever you visit the Daily Mail web-site, the first thing that confronts you will be a large box towards the centre of the page. This box, which will be called from now on the “So what?” box, is where all the stories that make you go “So what?” are displayed.

Take today’s “So what?” box as an example:

The triumvirate of trivial titillation for today includes:

• Wayne Rooney struggles to match wife Coleen’s suntan as couple continue to soak up the rays in Las Vegas
• Mother of Cristiano Ronaldo’s baby revealed to be an American waitress he seduced for a one night stand
• BBC pulls sketches poking fun at Eamonn Holmes’ weight after he calls in lawyers to complain

So what? I mean, really – does anyone care about any of those subjects apart from a) the people directly or indirectly involved or b) the shameful hacks who bashed these stories out on a keyboard? Perhaps this is more of a criticism of society’s obsession with celebrity-based nonsense, because of course the Mail would only have placed this rubbish in the position it does if it was especially popular but… you know… so what?

Aside from the boring subject matter, almost all of the “So what?” stories are based around a photo or a series of photos, with lots of unnecessary copy thrown in to make it look a bit more like an actual story. A perfect example of a “So what?” story inferred almost entirely from a photo is this one: Cheer up Konnie, you’re getting married! In this thrilling piece of investigative journalism, a photographer takes a few photos of Charlie Brooker out with his fiancée Konnie Huq, some photos in which they look particularly glum are selected and then a whole story is written around the photos. In fact, as Brooker himself said:

Even the Mail’s usually terrifying and hysterical commenters are in agreement with the pointlessness of the whole piece:

In other words, so what?